T<\/span>he fact that most of us will have the opportunity to live a longer older adulthood than previous generations raises the question for us, \u201cHow will we live those years?\u201d<\/p>\n I like to think of those years ahead as the beginning of a new journey. It\u2019s a new stage in our individual lives, and a new stage for us as a society.<\/p>\n When thinking about a journey to a place I\u2019ve never been before, I like to learn about the place and begin to find a map that will help me get there.<\/p>\n I\u2019ve spent the last few years listening to voices who have made this aging journey and making my own list of paths that can help me on the journey.<\/p>\n The first path on my list is \u201cconnect.\u201d Connection\u2014to ourselves and to others\u2014is an important part of our spiritual selves. Isolation and loneliness contribute to poor health in older adults. The trend towards smaller families, more people living singly than ever before, and an increasingly individualistic culture contribute to increasing isolation and loneliness.<\/p>\n A camp song says, \u201cMake new friends and keep the old; One is silver and the other gold.\u201d Experiencing the silver and gold of new and old friends requires that we be intentional about making and keeping connections.<\/p>\n Making connections is important to connecting to our own authentic self. Sometimes that self gets lost in the process of coming to maturity, seeking a vocational path and establishing families.<\/p>\n We may discover that we\u2019ve been living, seeking to meet others\u2019 expectations of us or have been so focused on economic and family issues that we\u2019ve lost track of ourselves.<\/p>\n Perhaps it is time to make friends with ourselves at the beginning of this journey into older adulthood. Listening to our own lives and accepting who and what we are is an important part of connecting in the spiritual journey of aging.<\/p>\n With a clearer sense of who we are, we can deepen existing friendships and family relationships, and we are better equipped to make new connections. When I worked at a large retirement community I watched people moving in to the community who, because of the stability of their lives, had not actually practiced making new friends in a very long time. Not only had they disrupted the geography of their lives, but the challenge of meeting new people and making new friends was almost too much.<\/p>\n I, on the other hand, have moved often during my life and have found myself making new friends over and over again. And it actually doesn\u2019t get easier with time.<\/p>\n So whether we\u2019re in the habit of making friends or not, it\u2019s important that we keep intentionally working at it. The silver and gold of new and old connections is an important part of the spiritual journey of aging. Those connections provide solace and support when the going is difficult. They also provide the context for shared happiness and joy when we celebrate. Shared experiences and memories make life better.<\/p>\n The second path on my list for navigating this spiritual journey of aging is \u201ccreate.\u201d<\/p>\n Zest for life comes when we are experiencing newness. How better to do this than to continuously challenge ourselves to create something new? Now this doesn\u2019t have to be art\u2014but it might be. Creating something\u2014whether it be putting words on paper, paint on canvas, stitches on cloth, screws in wood or finding a new way to solve a persistent problem\u2014all of these endeavors stretch us and invite us to expand the intuitive and imaginative parts of ourselves.<\/p>\n When we\u2019re at the point in our journey where old work identities no longer fit as well, finding creative processes can be an important part of our new way of being in the world. It may also be an opportunity to go back and retrieve activities and pastimes that were put aside in the super productive years of our lives. When we are creating, we are bringing into being things that only we, with our unique set of skills, ideas and experiences, can do.<\/p>\n Which brings me to the third path on my list for navigating the spiritual journey of aging, \u201ccontribute.\u201d We all have a need for meaning and purpose, which is a spiritual need. One of the temptations of growing older (particularly if our connections have diminished) is to be increasingly self-absorbed, unable to see beyond our own needs. We can avoid that trap if we are in the habit of seeking ways that we can contribute to the overall wellbeing of our communities and our world.<\/p>\n The needs of our communities can seem overwhelming as can the opportunities to get involved. There is no shortage of opportunities to do good works. In this time in our lives, we have more choice over the ways we spend our time than at any other point in our adult lives.<\/p>\n The fact that we objectively have less time left means that how we choose to use this time is an important spiritual decision. It is important that we find the place to contribute that matches our gifts and passions.<\/p>\n Frederick Buechner says, \u201cThe place God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world\u2019s deep hunger meet.\u201d One of the pluses of the spiritual journey of aging is to be able to discern our own deep gladness\u2014the pursuit that brings us the most joy\u2014and match it to a deep need for hope and healing in our world. Our companions who know us well can help us in that discernment. And we can bring our own creativity to the table as well as we make an ongoing contribution to the greater good.<\/p>\n Forge your own paths of connecting, creating and contributing as you go on your new journey.<\/p>\n Thoughts on the spiritual journey of growing older<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":808,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[57,56],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3738","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spring-2016-columns","category-spring-2016"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/healthyaging.net\/magazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3738","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/healthyaging.net\/magazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/healthyaging.net\/magazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/healthyaging.net\/magazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/healthyaging.net\/magazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3738"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/healthyaging.net\/magazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3738\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4092,"href":"https:\/\/healthyaging.net\/magazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3738\/revisions\/4092"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/healthyaging.net\/magazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/808"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/healthyaging.net\/magazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3738"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/healthyaging.net\/magazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3738"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/healthyaging.net\/magazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3738"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}Connecting to Ourselves and Others<\/h4>\n
Creating a New Way of Being<\/h4>\n
Contributing Passion and Purpose<\/h4>\n
Nancy Gordon is the Director of California Lutheran Homes Center for Spirituality and Aging, part of California Lutheran Homes and Community Services<\/a><\/span> (CLH), a Front Porch partner.<\/em><\/h5>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"